And the winners are….
Aug 11th, 2009 by Alexis

Hey, not so fast!

I’ve got to build up the suspense first.

I thought the other day about how it would be pretty fun to make a video of me writing down all the names, putting them in a hat, drawing out the winners…. Unfortunately, I don’t have a video camera, though it’s on the long list of things I “desperately” need (right in front of the industrial ice cream maker).

So even though it’s not nearly as cool or high-tech, I did take some quick snap shots of the process, which still could be fun. (At the very least, it will add more suspense! Woo!)

The ominous pile of names...  WHO will be chosen? WHAT fate lies ahead?

The ominous pile of names... WHO will be chosen? WHAT fate lies ahead?

The HAT OF DOOOOOM!  Chosen for maximum silliness.

The HAT OF DOOOOOM! Chosen for maximum silliness.

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Introducing… FairyTails + Giveaway!! [closed]
Aug 8th, 2009 by Alexis

Shocking Scientific Discovery: FairyTails Are Real!
Long thought to be purely mythological beasts, a recent study published by scientists at Oxford University proved once and for all that FairyTails are indeed real!

Most FairyTails bear a strong resemblance to other more common (and less magical) animal species, albeit much smaller and more ornately colored.

FairyTails are shy, elusive creatures that are rarely seen by humans in the wild and are even more difficult to catch. By a stroke of luck, strange berries on the Smarmy Compound attracted a sizeable herd, which we were able to capture and domesticate. (No FairyTails were harmed in this process.)

After weeks of experimentation, our own Dr. Smarmylox at the Smarmy Labs has developed what we believe to be a FairyTails superspecies. They have been specially bred for docility and superior cuteness.


If the FairyTails look familiar, it’s probably because you’re a fellow child of the 80’s and recognized that I’ve taken huge inspiration from the Lady Lovely Locks toys. Lady Lovely Locks was a cartoon franchise with dolls and animals that came with awesome little animal hair clips (known as PixieTails) that had brightly colored fake hair tails. I don’t remember if I had any of the dolls, but I know I had Silkymane, LLL’s horse.

Silkymane was pink and purple, making him/her the most badass horse ever.

Silkymane was pink and purple, making him/her the most badass horse ever.

My love for Lady Lovely Locks is second only to Jem, because Jem is outrageous.  And had a higher ration of pink hair (sorry Lady Lovely Locks!).

Nevertheless, those little PixieTail hair clips were probably the single most missed toy from my childhood. Over the past few years, I’ve tried many times to score some genuine PixieTails on Ebay, but the little suckers go for like $15 a piece, and it is no secret that I am a militantly thrifty mofo.  Plus, who knows how many kids have had them in their hair/hands/mouth!

A few weeks ago, Tim and I were compiling a list of the Greatest Cartoon Theme Songs of All Time, and I had that ol’ crafty lightbulb go off over my head.  Shiclaacky!!  (That’s the noise the lightbulb makes, in case you were wondering.)  I can make my own!

After countless hours of scouring the web for the right supplies, a little experimentation, and a fair amount of swearing, the FairyTails came true!  Quite frankly, they turned out about 1000 times better than I’d hoped.

They’re a really cute way to add a little crazy color to your hair mega-temporarily. And you don’t have to mess with trying to hide the clip like most clip-in extensions, because you’re supposed to see it!  FairyTails can be braided, curled, and crimped, just don’t feed them after midnight. And these babies haven’t been in ANY kid’s nose.

The FairyTails are available in my Etsy shop and at at a special introductory price of $10.
You get to choose the species, color, and hair color. (And I’ll be listing pre-made sets over the next few days.)

Here’s the fun part!  To celebrate this momentous occasion, I will be giving away a custom pair of FairyTails to TWO lucky individuals.

How to enter:

The easiest way is to comment here!  Make sure you include a valid email address with your comment so I can get in touch with you if you win!

Ways to earn extra entries:

  • Tweet or ReTweet this giveaway on Twitter (be sure to include the link to your tweet with your comment): RT @smarmyclothes Win a pair of FairyTails hair extension clips at
  • Post about this giveaway on your blog,  (be sure to include the link to your post with your comment)
  • Post a bulletin or blog post about this giveaway on your Myspace (be sure to include the link to your profile with your comment)
  • Post about this giveaway on your Facebook (be sure to include the link to your FB with your comment)
  • Past and present members of the Smarmy Army- post of photo of you in your Smarment with your comment to earn and extra entry.
  • Join my mailing list here (it counts if you’re already a member, too) and then include a note that you’ve signed up for it in your comment. Make sure the email you use to sign up with my mailing list is the same as the one you use to verify your comment.

The contest will close Tuesday, August 11th at 3pm EST, and I will choose two random names out of a hat (I’m old school like that) and announce the winners at approximately 3:30 pm EST.

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